Mammylu's House

Mammylu, Mother of 3, letting the random stuff out of my head a bit at a time…

Category: things aren’t going well

Today sucks

So… There have been some issues recently which meant stuff changed. Over the last three weeks I ditched Zumba and Pilates. And even the gym for a bit. I didn’t want to, but I couldn’t keep paying for stuff when we can’t afford it. So.. There you have it. I got back to the gym a couple of times this week, but my program (and reduced price) ends on Tuesday. So, that’ll be the end of that for the foreseeable future.

The thing is… Something I hadn’t expected had happened… I’d actually started to enjoy going to the gym (I know, it’s hard to believe). Once I got past the boredom bit, me and my iPod were quite enjoying the time together. We’d made a new playlist and everything.

Anyway.. Enough with the depressingness (new word- I think I like it). I’m going to have a cup of tea and I’ll speak write type to you all later.

Plans for the day include laundry… A trip out to buy some birthday gifts and possibly see the festive lights in the park. There’s some kind of ‘glowing orb’ visiting tonight, if it’s any good I may post pictures.

Bananas and herbal tea

20120930-223511.jpg

I just dug out my laptop, thinking it’d be nicer to type on. And I could listen to music too. After forty minutes of arguing with it, I have succeeded in emptying the recycle bin. So now I’m back to an iPod/iPhone combo. Apple have won again!

Anyway, bananas and herbal tea have been the theme for the weekend, as I found out on Friday that I’d put on 4lbs in a week and a half. Not exactly going well with the weight loss thing. But I’m not gonna dwell on negatives! Maybe I’ll have something positive to report on weigh-day-Wednesday?

Last weekend, I dragged family to local park to take part in a local ‘big walk’, we did a health walk. Husband didn’t want to be there and pointed that out almost continuously, and toddler ‘wasn’t tired’ but needed to be carried half way round, despite that, I enjoyed it. And toddler was happy with his medal.

20120930-224506.jpg

It did reinforce my family’s, (well my husband’s really), version of supporting me. It’s very much ‘do want you want, as long as I’m not involved’, but such is life! Anyway, it’s a nice park, and it wasn’t too cold. The walk leaders were people who knew the park really well, so we learnt stuff on the way – who knew there was a bed of chamomile there?

So, now I’m listening to some Sam Baker. Highly recommended, if you’ve never heard of him. Not like anything else I listen too. A little sad sometimes too, but sometimes it’s nice to listen to something that isn’t as cheerful, it puts stuff into perspective.

Well, before I get too maudlin, and turn this into a pitiful rant…. I’m not gonna go on about things that are in my head too much, a lot of them should stay there. But I will pose a question instead, if that’s ok – why would a husband tell a lie about where he had been and who he’d been with? (The presumption here is that nothing sinister is going on).

I think I should maybe quit while I’m ahead, good night folks xxx

Fun time Friday!

Today we went to a baby group, ‘time for rhyme’ and Lucas and decided to try and pinch a baby girl’s dummy. Is this some sign of affection in baby language? Does he have a girlfriend now? She’s a couple of weeks older than him though, will he grow up liking older women?

As we left the house, I removed another ‘Jesus loves you’ note from my letterbox, as whoever posts them leaves them sticking in the outside (my letterbox is pretty evil) and I don’t want the postman to think I’m leaving him random Jesus related notes.

On the way home, continuing the random religion theme, we stopped in at the local church hall, as they were holding a coffee morning to raise money for Macmillan. This is unusual for me, I tend to avoid churches. I respect the fact that lots of people have lots of different religions. As long as everybody respects my right to not be attached to one. But this was for charity, so I went and had a cup of tea with some old ladies. It was a change in routine, at least! And only 1 person asked me if baba was christened (he isn’t).

I was thinking a bit about religion after that. I used to go to church. I don’t now. It’s been a while.

So after lunch, I’m cleaning (you may have to bear with me, there’s a related point here eventually) and I’ve opened my bedroom window as baby is playing and I’m using furniture polish (my house is all on one floor, so we’re downstairs). I’ve also opened the blinds and the curtains to clean the window. I like to listen to music when I clean. I have a tendency to sing too. I like Belle and Sebastian, and was listening to an album called ‘write about love’.

Which is why, when the paper boy walked past, he heard me singing (possibly loudly) ‘I’ve seen god in the sun, I’ve seen god in the street, god before bed and the promise of sleep…’.

And he stared.

So now he thinks I’m mad. Maybe I am.

The night before weigh in…

And all through the house, no sweeties were eaten, not even a chocolate mouse….

And I do have some chocolate mice. I did eat some starburst though. There was less fat in them.

I’m now writing this on an iPod. So, apologies if the typing is worse than usual (good luck to the autocorrect figuring out what I’m trying to say!). This is because of a major wifi failure, which led to lots of trying to fix stuff, and resulted in my laptop and iPhone having a very long conversation (about 2 hours so far). I got bored and am in bed.

Obviously, the wifi is currently alive, or I wouldn’t be able to post this. We can’t have pictures though. Unless they’re from photostream. Hmmmm…. Just realised that hasn’t been working in ages and is now updating. I love technology!

Anyway, today’s big crisis was little person’s immunisations. All 3 of them! Very stressful for mammy, worried about having a 2 nearly 3 year old with us (last time he made a big scene). But it was ok. Big one read a story with me in the waiting room. Pretended to read it while watching them jab baby. Baby screamed. Then baby laughed at people watching him.

I gave him calpol (paracetamol) and he went to bed early, with only a breast feed. This is unprecedented, as even before the current weaning program (his teeth are too sharp, and bitey), he had an 8 oz bottle every night. Anyway, he seems to be ok. He never has medicine, so it’s possible that’s made him sleepy.

Sweeties were bought as rewards (yes, I bribe my toddler) and everyone survived.

But I should be sleeping… And I’m not. Quite frankly, I’m dreading tomorrow. Well, it has to be done! Let’s just see how bad it is, then I can start again. Repeat 500 times, ‘I will lose weight’.

Goodnight folks.

Off course, of course

So, I’ve been quiet for a little bit. I put 1lb back on, and have been off track ever since. Am now actually worried about getting weighed on Wednesday. Never mind! Tomorrow is another day.

One of the reasons for my naughty eating habits this weekend has been my house. It’s having a birthday next year, it’ll be 100. And it needed a repaint (outside) and a boundary wall repairing. So we thought. A couple of days work. So we thought.

So, we packed off the kids, my dad (all round DIY expert) came over and… Stuff starting dropping off, and looking damp (never a good thing!). In short, part of my house that was rendered is now naked.

20120903-221707.jpg
I have some pretty red bricks though! So, how does that make you eat badly? I hear you ask… Well. When working, it is customary to feed the workers. Something quick and easy, so as not to interrupt the work much. So, chips and vegetable pakora for lunch. It’s also customary to provide refreshments. Which means beer. And as the kids were staying out, it meant more beer later (and a date night, but I’m going to try a ‘proper’ serious write up on that one next).

So, it’s all gone a bit awry. But I have been burning calories doing crochet (If google says it burns more calories than watching telly, I believe it!) and have finished of a couple of projects that have been hanging around:

20120903-222258.jpg

20120903-222319.jpg
Just for clarification, the blanket was the project, not the baby! He’s the blanket tester. I also made a couple of new things:

20120903-222422.jpg

20120903-222437.jpg

20120903-222446.jpg
I’m trying to make a hat right now, which is a bit of a challenge. And I want to write about what I did at the weekend, but my broadband is off (as usual!) and I can’t figure out how to link to the site on my phone. I’m sure I’ll find a way!!

I’m not sure what’s going on

I don’t think I’m too bad as a person. I try my best and stuff. But recently I’ve been, well, ignored by some of my family. It started with not getting a birthday card from an aunt, then my sister.

Now I sent a text to say my little one has conjunctivitis, and got no reply. So I sent another one, asking if anyone had sympathy for him (he’s 5 months old). Still nothing. I mean, I wasn’t expecting much, just a text message asking how he was maybe.

And it’s nearly the end of the holidays, and my sister hasn’t met up with me once during the day.

I know I’m whining, but I haven’t slept for 3 days, I’m looking after a poorly baba and trying to amuse a toddler, all without spending any money.

And it hard when it feels like there’s no one else cares.

Ok, rant over! I have to get the kids ready and go out.

Poorly Sick

So, since the last time I posted, big kid got poorly sick. Properly. This is unusual, although he has his fair share of coughs and colds, he’s rarely actually ill.

This led to a bit lot more staying in the house, and a little lot more snacks and bad stuff. So… I went to the gym yesterday, first day on weights (scary). Did ok, survived and felt fine. Husband started work at lunchtime, so brought the kids home and fed the baby (big one still not well), then I got a migraine. Recently, I’ve been having different migraines, ophthalmic ones, which was a bit unnerving until I googled it to find out it’s nothing to panic about!

However, it didn’t go away, I got worse and worse, ending up moving the kids into my bed, so we could all lie down. Big kid took this opportunity to start getting better, and got lively again. I ended up dizzy and faint, and husband had to come home. I felt awful (literally) and awful (guilty) as he’d had to leave work, but I physically couldn’t get up and move round properly.

Hoping this was a one off!!! Not letting it put me off. Had a rest day today, went to fat class, lost 1lb. Not great, but better than I expected. We learnt about labelling today, and basically how most of the when you pick something because it says ‘diet’ or ‘light’ it’s not that good. I was surprised by how much sugar was in cereal bars!! Haven’t eaten them since I was pregnant, but I won’t be eating them again!

Back to the gym tomorrow. Afternoon this time, and I’ll drink lots more, as that seems to be the key. I get migraines for eyesight (all good, fairly new glasses), blood pressure (currently behaving) and dehydration (doh!).

Fairly easy to fix though, that’s a good thing. Well, I need to sleep. G’night folks! Good luck to anyone braving anything new tomorrow xx

It’s a biscuity kinda day…

So far today, I have eaten 2 weetabix, some vegetable crisps and 5 digestive biscuits. I feel sick. I won’t be getting out for a walk, as my big kid is ill.

Not going well, come back resolve! I need you! Where has motivation gone??

On another note – I sent his to my husband at work, it about sums up my day so far:

Mammy day care would like to point out that sick Toddlers and one toothed vampire babies are not accepted in day care. Sick toddler is either hot or cold and is residing on the sofa, refusing to let mammy leave. Whilst vampire baby was being put to bed for biting people and extreme tiredness, sick toddler’s toe was bitten by a passing cat. Cat has been ejected, no injuries or tears, cat not told off as possibly self defence.

I should change that to probably self defence though!

Off the rails a little bit….

So… Yesterday was ok, foodwise. I went to the gym first thing, 300 and 20something calories later (not much, but it’s a start) I caught up with the family, we took largest to an indoor play place, had lunch (jacket potato) at a supermarket, and then hit the beach for a little walk.

20120812-222747.jpg

20120812-222801.jpg

Little was teething, that’s why he’s eating his wrap.

I made a pretty decent evening meal (even if I do say so myself!)

20120812-222918.jpg
And then had an argument with husband which resulted in him sleeping in the sofa. Apparently, he waited all night for me to come and tell him to go to bed. I didn’t.

So, today was pretty bad, foodwise. There may have been sweeties.

I tried to redeem myself with a healthy lunch (giant cous cous and beans with salad)

20120812-223146.jpg

But… We had a mini BBQ, so I’m way over on my protein and carbs for today. I also had 2 alcohol free beers. Which is just pointless calories!!!!

20120812-223323.jpg
And then because things had gone wrong, I had chocolate. Followed by icecream. The cone looked evil, but I still ate it.

20120812-223425.jpg

Little baba cut his tooth today. Part came through and he cut the rest biting an ice cube (in a net thingy) that I’d giving him to try and numb it.

So… Tomorrow I get back on the straight and narrow. I haven’t any exercise planned, but will at least fit a walk in somewhere. And no sweeties. And the right amount of carbs and protein. I am not messing this up because other things in my life are messed up!

Tomorrow is another day, and I’m going to sleep so it comes faster. G’night all, hope you’re doing better than me xx

Annual Haircut and falling off the wagon

So, today I got my haircut. All my money seems to disappear, so I don’t ever often have spare money. So I get it cut as short as possible (so I can still tie it up though, important with small kids). That way it doesn’t get too long. My hair is still at the falling-out-having-just-had-a-baby stage. Hair dresser gave advice – good shampoo, and brush gently.

My mother bought me new conditioner after finding out I had just bought wilkinsons own brand. Well, it was on offer!!

Food wise, the day started well, with porridge and banana. Then it got a little bit bad, at starbucks… I’d like to think a skinny latte isn’t that bad!

Then my mam and stepdad took me out for lunch… I had decide if I was being bad or good.

My logic is this: if I deny myself treats for my birthday (i really don’t ever go out normally), then I’ll be demoralised and less likely to continue. That’s me excuse anyway!

So… A half pint of lager, cheese and bean toastie and chips, skinny latte number 2 and cupcake later…. Then pizza and an icecream for tea. It looks worse in writing!

Back on the wagon tomorrow!!!!!

Husband wants to join me, so we’ll see how that works out for us (hopefully better, as we’ll motivate each other to be good).

In other news, I bought a wine home brew kit for my husband. It was £3. Let’s see what happens with that too.

So, I had a nice day out, no kids for the first time since baba was born, husband enjoyed being trusted with both kids for the first time too. Although I was happy to see that he looked slightly relieved when I got back.

I bought a kids introduction to phonics today as well, it wasn’t how I learnt to read, and I think I need to understand it before my kid starts learning it! You wouldn’t believe I was a qualified teacher, would you?

I’m gonna drink some wine now, and not the tiny weeny glass I had last night! Well, only 2 days of my 20s left!